Is it worth it?

I don't know if it is anymore....

Every time I cry, it's just to help release the tension in my body. Makes me seem more relaxed.

I don't do it for attention. I just need to do it, because if these tears don't come out, neither will this pain. The pain will stay if the tears stay. They need to go away.

***

Back again. And I think it's high time for me to change my idiotic outlook on things. This pessimistic, melancholy view on life is a bit overbearing, a bit too much, and it weighs heavily on my soul.

My soul has had enough. I think it's time to look at the good things in life all the time. Focus on the postives. Hopefully that will delete the negatives, or at least set them aside because they honestly do not matter.

So it's worth it. It's definitely worth it.

If you think of giving up, of letting go, of giving in completely and surrendering to your inevitable fate, well think again because it's not worth it.

Not like you living life, trying to maintain your health at least and making the most of everyday. Living your life to the fullest, however that may be. It all depends on our preferences after all. If you want to be a lady who to many other people claim has no life because all you do is sit by the fireside and read a book, well so be it! To me, and to everyone else that should be considered a life. Because you're breathing, you're inhaling oxygen. That's something.

If you however fuck people's lives over, intentionally or unintentionally, then you stranger have no life at all. You should be sent to an asylum or something for your bad traits and, no, I did not mean any offense because clearly I belong there too. What with my recent posts, you can tell I'm clinically ill.

I was never diagnosed as crazy or bipolar, just fucking sad and it's sad how nobody wanted to talk to me for a while after I mentioned that I returned from the institute. But whatever, those types of people don't deserve your respect if you're a respectful individual who takes no part in fucking other peoples lives over.

You're better than that. Oh and by the way, before I forget to mention...

You're worth it. So keep breathing in that air, put down that knife, stash away that gun and just keep living.

There's so much more to live for. It's ignorant to throw it all away.