4 in the morning

And I can't sleep.

Used to take sleeping pills but that didn't work. So now I'm up and I'm writing. Writing is such a good alternative to thinking... Thinking too much, I mean.

When I write, I think but it's still a way for me to express my feelings or whatever is going on with my mind through the written word. I wanted to cry earlier, but it's useless to cry. Especially when I can just type.

Humans do that to you. They make you cry. Their actions and their behavior and their words, oh their words, they truly make me cry. It makes me think that this planet has only an ounce of humanity left. The rest have fallen under the "I don't give a fuck" apathetic way of thinking. And that is a sad tale to tell, so I won't.

Some nights, I can sleep soundly and I wake up feeling refreshed and alive. Other times, I wake up and look like a freaking zombie for crying out loud and my attitude is the same way. Better get me food or I will eat you instead like a cannibalistic animal and zombies can't get enough of living flesh. But halt, and don't call the cops. I'm totally joking haha, but I will be grumpy.

I hate many things about me. That's one side. So what do I love? I love the fact that I have never ever, not once, have claimed to ruin other people's lives for the heck of it. That just proves to the world that I want to project myself as some cruel spirit who wants to reign above all through my corruption and the methods in which I can conquer your lives. If you have ever done that, just think to yourself and listen to yourself.

"I'm going to ruin your life." That's what a villain would say... And truth be told, if that's ever come out of your mouth, you sound like a complete maniac. Given the context, of course. But still... If you were to say that to a stranger, how fucking dare you?

Where is your common courtesy? And now where is mine, because this hate and this animosity is surrounding me and making me sound like a cruel bitch too. If you can't have some fucking respect, expect me to shoot you next time you say that, because violence begets violence, pal.

Or rather, not pal, because you started this whole commotion. Say things like that, people will want to be your enemy. Because you're mine now and I can only think bad things coming from you. Once words that cruel and that corrupt leave your mouth, my impression of you will be the very same. And guess what baby?

You can always feel the same way about me.